Changing your body vs. changing how you feel about your body.
TWO DIFFERENT THINGS.
They can happen separately or simultaneously, but working on the ‘feelings’ bit is the only way to truly feel at peace in the body you have. There are tons of women who get to their goal weights, fit into the jean size they’ve decided is ‘good’ or hit other aesthetic related goals who love their bods no better than before they started. Many simply go from being obsessed about losing weight to being obsessed about maintaining it. Others find new flaws to focus on, other things to fix. And many find that promises like “OMG, weight loss gets rid of ALL your problems and brings on nothing but HAPPY SUNSHINE TIMES” were nothing but a bunch of lies.
Life doesn’t suddenly get perfect when you lose weight. Your issues are still your issues, your problems are still your problems, and some find themselves disappointed that the magic wand of weight loss didn’t magically fix everything.
Everyone deserves to feel at home in their own skin. Which is why working towards body acceptance - even if you’re working on changing some things - is SOOOO beneficial for both your progress and your overall happiness. If what you want is to be happier in your body, you need to confront the reasons you aren’t with a bit more ferociousness and more depth.
Most people find that those reasons are a bit deeper than simply reducing cellulite.
Being just a little kinder to your body is a step in the right direction, whether you still want to change it or not. Maybe start today?
If you could thank your body for ONE thing, what would it be? If you could give your body a high five for something, what would it be? If your body was more of a best friend to you, instead of an enemy, what would you say to cheer it up? How can you change your language and inner dialogue to make your body more of a valuable vessel instead of an obstacle?
Few people learn to love their bodies overnight, but all people who do end up loving their bodies start small. With a change in thinking, a tweak in language, positive peeps surrounding them etc.
If you’re not ready to scream “I love my body”, maybe work on “I’m kind to my body” instead.
Baby steps. :)
This image didn’t always piss me off. And others like it didn’t always piss me off. I was used to seeing them, hearing the rhetoric, and was deeply subscribed to the belief that it was normal & appropriate to motivate women this way.
In an industry where it’s often hard to get women to hop on the resistance train, encouraging them with reminders that it’ll turn them into ridiculously hot amazon women seems to work. Women respond to it and if it gets them squatting, the ends justify the means, right? (No. Not right, but we’ll get to that).
Clearly, I don’t feel the same way now. Body love epiphanies and tipping points will do that to you. But if you’re still where I was, and think these images are harmless, here’s some reasons you might want to rethink them.
First, let’s explore “The Making Of A Pro-Squat Fitspo Image For Women”.
A. Find pictures of bootylicious booties, usually headless. If said images aren’t already headless, cut the heads off. Zoom in on booty.
B. Place the words “squat” or “deadlift” all over them. If possible, accompany by a statement (implied or explicit) that those two exercises will make your booty RIDIC HOT, just like the headless girls in the image. Make said booty as sexually explicit as possible by showcasing it in underwear or booty shorts.
C. To really drive the point home, give the comparison treatment: showcase another smaller, flatter booty, (also headless) and dub said booty the ‘BAD non-squatty, non-deadlifty” booty Just another visual, to make sure you know the difference between a good butt and a bad butt.
D. If true fear or shame is what you’re after, apply a hefty dose of “men prefer women who squat, because of course” and duh, you want a hot booty to impress the fellas. The more implications that your ability to be attractive to men depends on squats, the better.
It’s a show and tell, nothin’ to hide, body pride kind of a day, so posting this pic for a reader who messaged me about how ‘abnormal’, ‘gross’ and ‘ugly’ her stretch marks were.
She said she didn’t know anyone who had them on their thighs, butt or boobs like she did. I thought I’d put an end to that.
Hi. I’m Chichi. Nice to meet you. These are my thighs/hips. And some of my stretch marks. I’d show you my boobs, but FB gets weird about that. I pinky swear, their stretch marks look similar. I also have scars, cellulite, a big birthmark on my belly and a horrible, ill advised playboy bunny tattoo on my low back. I was 16 and thought it was ‘cool’. These all used to be things I hated about myself. I decided that didn’t work for me anymore and now I’m pretty cool with ‘em. No shame.
My body doesn’t need me to apologize for it. It’s wicked.
I have no story behind these marks. They aren’t tiger stripes, or battle wounds. At my biggest, I was a size 12-14. My boobs are smaller now, but I had the marks pretty much out of puberty. This is just my bod. I didn’t do anything to earn it. But I’m down with it.
I don’t know what your body looks like, but I can guarantee ‘most’ of us here have stretch marks or cellulite. Or will one day. You might have more marks, less marks, lighter marks, darker marks or none at all. But no matter what your body’s own brand of quirky brings, know that there are millions of beautiful women in the same boat. It’s normal. It’s beautiful. It’s not gross.
So here. Check my legs out. I’m not everybody, just somebody. And I have awesome legs and stretch marks. Bam.
(PS- Fit Mama Training started an avalanche of awesome earlier. Click on the link for the most amazing post ever.)